The Four Walls

I’m ready for a change.

I’ve spent the last year of my life learning about myself, my body, changing my mindset and my health. I felt so great, confident, radiant, youthful, like nothing could ever take me down. Even after I had COVID, I had this new found drive and motivation to get out of debt, build a business, and keep reaching for more. It’s the healthiest form of change and growth I’ve experienced in my adult life – there were no “get skinny” or “get rich quick” schemes, I thought I had changed for good. I thought that I had learned to manage my time and my weight and my marriage and ALL THE THINGS and my problems were solved FOR GOOD.


I had such a good thing going and then I got sick. I spent a good month between March and April unable to get off the couch or stay awake. I was exhausted, drained, and in pain. My bloating and abdominal pain was so bad some days I could hardly walk normally. I felt all used up. You can read more about that here: I’ve not been well…

Once I finally started feeling better, Craig was in the field and I had to hold down the fort for about a month. After we came out of the fog of planting season, I was picking up every extra shift I could to stay out of debt and afford a massive amount of unexpected bills – about $5,000 worth.

I found myself saying, “Just one more weekend!” or “it will be better next month.” The time that I had prioritized for my health and my family had vanished and I’ve just been keeping my head above water for the past 3 months and I’m sick of it. My head spins all day long with “I’ve got to do this and this and this and this…” and then I never just START anything because I’m too busy thinking about all I have to do!

Maybe you feel the same way or have felt the same way in the past. I wanted to share what I’m doing to get back on track and keep you posted along the way.

  1. Start each day with a to do list – and by a to-do list, I mean a MUST GET DONE TODAY list. I’m not very good with “habits” or “routines” because my days are never the same due to working night shift. This gives me a chance to decide what I can get done with the time I have according to that day. This includes what I intend to eat through the day as well.
  2. Honestly, just TAKING CARE OF YOUR BODY. Be intentional about what I put in my mouth, the sleep I get and as always Drink. More. Water. I have NEVER regretted drinking more water throughout the day. Some days I come home and reach for an “adult beverage” and I think “this just doesn’t taste/feel good.” Well DUH! My body is screaming “please give me some water!” as I sip on my white claw.
  3. Make time to either move or meditate or breathe or journal. Something that’s just for me that isn’t “doing.”
  4. Make time for my family. Uninterrupted family time – sometimes I even set a timer to make sure I stay engaged.

All this to say, these are my four walls. If you listen to the Dave Ramsey show, you know what the four walls are. Food, shelter, transportation, and utilities. It keeps the lights on and the food on the table! When you’re in a crisis, these four necessities must be protected at all costs. Just focus on these four.

These four things I listed are my mental health four walls. I’m in “crisis mode” and running on E but I know that if I just start with focusing on these four things, I can stay engaged and intentional. From there I can make better choices, build stronger habits, and get back on the horse. You can’t build new habits on a shaky foundation. So I’m going to Flex Your Comeback Muscle and get this train back on track!

Thanks for checking in with me! I’ll see you again soon!

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  1. Amy
    June 18, 2021 / 1:54 pm

    Preach sister! I don’t even have a family to take care of anymore and I still feel on empty. I make a ‘to do’ list everyday. Then I forget to read it and do the things on the list. I used to sew or quilt everyday. After the drama of last year, I have lost my mojo. Just can’t seem to get motivated. I am going to try to start slowly. Maybe 15 minutes a day of quilting or preparing fabric for sewing. I just need to get back to doing what makes me the happiest. That was taking care of my ill father and my son. Well, father passed away and son grew up and moved away. I need to learn how to do for me without the guilt. Best of luck to you! I will be watching to see how you are doing. And I am determined to take a selfie in my new shirt just to show Carver how excited I was to get that card from him.

  2. Paula Nordt
    June 18, 2021 / 11:31 pm

    Kalissa, I may have missed the post about it, but di you ever figure out what was causing your abdominal pain?

  3. Kim J LeMere
    June 23, 2021 / 9:56 am

    I’m a list maker and its kept me on track and focused more so than not. I think it was a way to keep all those moving parts moving while working and raising a family, life can get hectic. Just be careful that your own list doesn’t beat you up, be willing to move things to the next day’s list if needed. I hope you are feeling better, that alone can make ones wake up with energy and a smile.

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