Everyone loves a good transformation. I’m definitely guilty posting before and after photos after a recent weight loss. I don’t think I’m going to do that anymore and I wanted to explain why:

Back in 2020 I posted this as an update on my recent weight loss/health journey. I cringe now when I see this post. When people post a before and after photo, there’s a suggestion that the “before” is seen in a negative or a “bad” light. Let me tell you about that before girl.

That before girl just buried her Dad three weeks before this picture was taken. She had just given birth 3 months ago. The baby she had was going through some medical issues and had already had a few hospitalizations. She went back to work part time 3 weeks after her c-section to provide for her family. She gave up her maternity leave to keep her mom’s business running while her dad was losing his fight to lung cancer. Her family was barely making it paycheck to paycheck and deeply in debt. She had survived some of the most difficult months of her entire life and had just turned 23.

Now go ahead and tell that before girl she’s unworthy because of a number on the scale and the size of her dress. Tell her she doesn’t matter. Tell her she will just be some before picture some day and that’s all she’s worth.

The before and after photos don’t tell the whole story. They don’t define the person. You can’t see the changes I’ve made in just a snap shot. You can’t see the hard work and the sacrifices and the therapy sessions and the progress and the set backs. You can’t see me in this photo.

I had a moment a few weeks ago I was scrolling through my phone, I came across this picture on the left. It was taken in January of this year before I got pregnant. I sent it to my husband and my mom and my sisters, lamenting the body that pregnancy had taken from me and that I’d worked so hard for. I was certain when I snapped the picture on the left that would forever be my “after picture.” Boy was I wrong.

The picture on the right was taken last week, 9 months after the first one. The after picture has now become the before picture. Before I got pregnant, before my ankles swelled up to twice their size, before I got short of breath walking literally anywhere. I was mortified when I initially saw this picture of me with my mom, then I got to thinking.

This is such a small window of time in my life. This is possibly the last time I’ll carry a child. I can appreciate the body that has safely carried three babies thus far. I know now there really is no permanent before or after. My body will get bigger and smaller, my skin will clear up and break out again. My hair will be long and short. My C cups will surely return to A cups and back again. My stretch marks will fade and come back stronger with another pregnancy. There are so many more things to appreciate about my body and myself as a person than one single snapshot in time.

From here on out, I vow to never post “before and after photos.” I just am who I am. I just look how I look. I strive to nourish and take excellent care of my body. I strive to appreciate and respect my body. I know now that the before is never the before for too long and the after is also never the after for very long either. Neither is good, neither is bad. Both are worthy of love.

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