“I am just hating this.”

My heart just broke.

Carver has been so ready for preschool.. in fact, he has been TOO ready for preschool since he turned three last September.

Carver, similar to how my mother would describe me, is either all the way three years old or he talks to me like I’m having a conversation with a friend my age.

He’s known all of the “need to know” to go to preschool things since he was two. Every morning we completed his ABC puzzle over waffles before 7 am. Uppercase and lowercase. Carver is even going as far as recognizing basic sight words.

I even wanted to send him LAST year. Carver was born on September 16th, 2016 at 1:04 am. The cutoff for school is September 15th birthdays, an hour and 4 minutes after the school cutoff.

We’ve been talking about it for so long, watching the older kids get on the bus every morning. He adores our bus driver Jerry who also is a family friend. Carver couldn’t wait to ride his bus.

All this to say, he is READY for preschool and I WANT him in preschool.

But now we aren’t sure. We aren’t sure the risk is worth the reward of sending him. Of all the years that are optional, 3 year old preschool is optional. Will he even be able to play with his friends? Share toys? Will he have to keep a mask on the whole time? Will it be more like a sterile regimen or an actual fun/safe playing learning environment?

I think like many other parents and schools are feeling, there is just too much unknown. I’ve talked it over with Craig and with my mom and everyone else but Carver.

So today when he made a reference to going to preschool, I started explaining that he might not be able to go to preschool this year.

“Cuz of the corona virus?”


”I don’t want to get sick.”

“That’s right Carver. And we don’t want to get anyone else sick.”

“I can wear a mask at preschool!”

“We still aren’t sure if it is the best choice.”

“Okay mom. But mom, I am hating this.”

Oh sweet boy. I almost corrected his language, I was never allowed to say “hate” growing up – only greatly dislike. Well, I’m going to let this one slide because Carver, I am HATING this too.

”Mommy, are you hating this too?”

Yes baby boy. I am. It’s so hard to know what is right or wrong, what is too cautious and what is too reckless. Who knows what the next month will bring?

He misses his friends so much, he misses coming into Walmart with me, He might not even remember what a world without masks looks like and now he might miss preschool which we have all been looking forward to for so long.

The innocence and honesty of those few words, “Mom I am hating this” out of my three going on thirty year old little boy broke my heart.

Me too Carv, me too.

Thanks for reading friends ✌🏻

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P.S. I’ve seen your comment on the header and we are working on it! Thanks!

Gannon and Bathroom Update!

GUYS! So much good news in this post!

First of all, remember Gannon got anal Botox last week? It is WORKING! We have cut his laxative use IN HALF!! 👏🏻👏🏻 His belly is SO SOFT and so flat – for the first time in his life, he looks like a normal kiddo ❤️ POOPING IS NOT PAINFUL FOR HIM! Hallelujah! 🙏

We have had two early access (some call it birth to three) meetings today and I fished over the progress Gannon has made in the last month! His personality has BLOSSOMED, he is using a few new words/signs, he will meow when he sees a kitty at Grandma Debbie’s house, she said he even said kitty! He says hi and mom and dad and hey and bye! These were all goals we discussed at his very first early access keystone meeting and he has met them 😃

My mom and I were brainstorming what made the change and we really think that since he was in Milwaukee he has just grown so much. The ONLY thing we can think of that we changed is now he is on soy milk 90% of the time, still eats cheese, still occasionally has dairy based milk but mostly eats solid food and has 2-3 bottles a day of soy milk.

Also, Gannon likes peaches I guess 🤷‍♀️ 🍑
In the two seconds it took me to grab mushrooms, Gannon grabbed a peach off the shelf and CHOWED DOWN – ate the ENTIRE THING before we got to the checkout and made sure to pay for it 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ As embarrassing as that was, it was the sweetest, cutest, most innocent act of theft I’ve ever witnessed.

Thank you for sticking with me through my IT glitches, my sister Kayla has launched a new business giving blogs a makeover and launching certain technology platforms for people. Kayla has entirely built my blog and organized my ads so shout out to her on her new business venture, Ms. Pins Media. The header issue *should* be fixed so if that caused you to miss my latest blog post, check it out in the link below. Please comment and let me know if it is still glitchy on your end.

Also, BATHROOM UPDATE! Slowly but surely, our bathroom vanity is being installed! EEK! We are so excited! Here’s a sneak peek:

in process (Carver pulled out the step stool)

I just cannot wait to have my full bathroom back again. Craig, so innocently, made the comment in how I’ve not been getting as dolled up lately (true) and I explained that my makeup and hair products are now in 8 different places! Everything is scattered and our downstairs bathroom is out of commission! We’ve got two bigger side cupboards, the mirror, the tile all to install yet but BABY STEPS are still steps!

That’s what I know! Short and sweet! Thanks for your love and support and patience friends!

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The Friedman Fam Update!

Craig thinks he is so funny – he rearranged my “Summer lovin’ had me a blast” sign to this 🙄 I asked him what an ass BLT is and he said a nasty BLT sandwich 🤷‍♀️

But we really are having a blast. Last night we went from pool to bike ride to bedtime movie. I got a new swim suit and loved it! I took a chance on a new website online. I love their suits so much I’m working on establishing an affiliate relationship with them – more to come soon!

When I took Gannon to the doctor last week, Carver got a day on the farm with Craig.

He was SO excited. He got to haul loads, take a ranger ride, eat ice cream, ride in the tractor with Tom, it was so sweet that they welcomed him into their day and Carver is STILL talking about it.

Sneak peek of the bathroom cupboards! Just waiting to get the final installation! EEEK!!

The boys got an eye exam today – no glasses yet! 🤓 They were difficult to wrangle but Sherry was SO patient and kind and understanding. She didn’t make me feel embarrassed for how naughty the boys were. She really made a difference.

Gannon has this habit of spoiling himself any time we enter a doctors office 🙄 so THAT was an issue too! I didn’t think I’d need to bring the full diaper bag in just for a quick eye exam – my boys have always done that!

Carver got some FAN mail from a blog reader who sent him some fabric with tools on it! From being a farmer to SO PROUD of his tool fabric 🥰

Being he loves “twilting” with Grandma Joey, he wanted a picture of her and him and the fabric 😂 just like Joey takes pictures of her quilts!

That’s all I have folks! This little guy learned what a kitty says and it’s the cutest thing ever! Making progress every day!

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Gannon Update – Cardiology and Botox

I have some wonderful news! We are done in Iowa city until July 28. We still have a few random appointments here and there and we are thankful we don’t have to drive to Milwaukee, but even the trek to Iowa city was getting pretty long.

This week was crazy. I worked all day on Monday. Bright and early Tuesday morning Gannon and I were on the road by 5:30 AM to get to Iowa city by 7:30 AM.

We had our cardiology follow up appointment to gain some clarification on his echocardiogram. We really like our pediatric cardiologist. I love doctors who really love kids and it’s obvious that he really loves kids.

He explained that as Gannon’s heart is right now, it is considered normal. While he is on the very high end of normal, he is still normal. This is something that we will check every year. We have a follow up appointment scheduled for next July with an echocardiogram and then to see our cardiologist again.

Gannon does have what’s called a PFO or a patent foramen ovale which effects 25% of the population has. It is a hole between the top two chambers of the heart. This is a very normal variation and he said it’s only an issue if he ever wants to go deep-sea diving or if he becomes symptomatic.

While his arteries are on the more dilated side of things, he is still considered normal and he kept reiterating that to us. After that we got a Covid swab before our Wednesday procedure and we were on our way home.

On Wednesday, we had to be up and on the road by 6:30 AM to make it to Waterloo to be fitted for fitted for his braces for his feet and ankles. We had originally thought that the braces had to go up to his knees, but after further evaluation we think it would be best if they just went up to above his ankle to offer more stability and not take away the mobility he has.

When we got to the Waterloo orthotics office, the lights were all off in the parking lot was empty. I ended up calling the receptionist and asking if I had gotten the time wrong and she said “no, you are scheduled for 8:30 this morning in the Cedar Rapids office not the Waterloo office!”

Thankfully they were able to fit us in in the Cedar Rapids office and we were already on our way to Iowa city that day anyway.

In the meantime, Gannon has a new fun feature where he gets extremely carsick. Throughout this whole time, the drive to Waterloo, the drive to Cedar Rapids, and the drive to Iowa city Gannon had vomited and gone through three full outfits. We have no idea where this started or came from but ever since he got his first COVID swab before his motility test in Milwaukee, he has been vomiting if we drive for more than 30 minutes in the car.

Any and all suggestions on how to deal and help with car sickness is so welcome. I ended up getting him a silicone bib to wear so that it catches some of the vomit, I put together again and puke kit for the car, and I asked for Zofran for the ride home after his procedure on Wednesday which helped him keep down his food after his procedure.

Anyway, we got to Iowa city and Gannon got the Botox injections into his anus. He had to be sedated for it and everything went really well without any complications which is the first procedure or surgery that has gone perfectly as expected. We are so happy with our care at the University of Iowa.

When we got home, (after supper at my mom’s – thanks mom and thanks Karl for picking up Carver after work!) Craig and I cleaned up the house put the kids to bed and spend our evening in the pool catching up. They made oatlage this week and have been super busy so it was so nice to have alone time.

I know some of you were looking for an update on how the room sharing situation has been and I am happy to say that it was a good switch and worth tearing apart the crib for. You can read more on that in the latest post link below. Although I did come in and find this last night:

For some reason his floor looked way more comfy than his bed? I’ve got some strange little boys.

Gannon gets his braces two weeks from now, and then we have genetic testing on July 28 which we are so excited for! Tomorrow the boys both have an eye exam! Lots of appointments and things to do but getting closer to answers and the long list of appointments. Thanks for reading! I’m off to work the weekend!

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Switching Up the Bedtime Routine

I get so frustrated when people tell me to “make myself a priority” and “get up earlier” to spend time alone. There’s a few issues with that:

The second my feet it hit the floor, no matter 4:50 or 6:20 am, Carver is awake wanting food, wanting TV, wanting to go drive his Jeep, wanting to play puzzles – he doesn’t just crawl into bed with us, he’s needing our attention.

We’ve tried nightlights, he comes and wakes us up when they time out. We’ve tried making a big deal out of bedtime and making it special. We’ve tried yelling, grounding, you name it, we’ve tried it.

Carver won’t go to sleep unless we are upstairs with him so there is no “after the kids go to bed.” Carver will. Not. Stay. In. His. Room. In. His. Bed. Unless we are in our bed.

Carver will get up in the night and go downstairs, I found he drew on his wall, he pulled the carpet remnants out of our closets, he found my box of ornaments and started playing with them, I don’t know if or when he sleeps. I don’t feel right putting a lock on his door AND he won’t sleep with the door closed. The light MUST be on. Gannon is a PERFECT sleeper and always has been. But Carver, ugh. At 15 months old he came in our room and woke us up one morning – he had JUMPED out of his crib – at 15 MONTHS OLD! It’s been downhill from there.

Many mornings, we find this:

Here he took all of the tote lids and hangers and spare blankets and pillows and “cleaned up” (our) the linen closet onto the floor of his bedroom. That was the final straw.

Needless to say, bed time and sleeping time and morning time is a struggle in the Friedman home and Craig and I just want some alone time, some ME time. We’ve been planning on moving Gannon’s crib into Carver’s room for months but never got around to it.

Craig has been gone working for what seems like weeks on end now with no end in sight so I decided to do it myself (with a little hint of attitude in there) which doesn’t sound like a big deal until I started and realized the bed needed to be COMPLETELY taken apart.

So there I sat, if you can imagine it, still in my swimsuit from getting out of the pool, trying to corral my children away from the open staircase while I disassemble a crib and shove it through the worlds smallest doorway and put it back together in an un-air conditioned room (it has air conditioning I just hadn’t turned it on yet). I literally had sweat dripping down my brow.

TA-DA! 45 minutes later, way more profane words than I should have used in front of my children, the room has been cleaned, vacuumed, the sheets fresh, the night light charged, and now we can shut the door AND turn the light off!

I hope Carver stays in bed, I hope he lets poor Gannon sleep, I hope he doesn’t wake up when I do now because his door is CLOSED and he’s at least got his own space that’s now clean. I hope that going to bed isn’t an occasion we all dread.

That’s the Friedman Family update! Thanks for reading!

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Trust us.

According to Forbes.com, Nurses are the #1 most trusted profession in the entire world with medical doctors at a close second in terms of ethical standards and honesty.

That says a lot. Especially considering nurses have earned this title for the 17th year in a row.

When we tell you that you’re going to be okay, you trust us. You reach for our hand with tears in your eyes and you know that we will be the first person you see when you wake up from surgery. 

When we teach you how to manage your diabetes, you trust us. You don’t argue and tell us that diabetes is a hoax and that it isn’t real. 

When a doctor sits you down to have that dreaded conversation, there are no more options to treat your cancer and that he recommends that we do our best to keep you comfortable, you trust him and you know that they hold your best interest at heart. 

When we tell you you have a bladder infection and we prescribe you antibiotics, you go to the pharmacy and pick them up and take them, right? 

When your child isn’t breathing, when your dad is having a stroke, you trust us. 

When we tell you you are cancer free, you believe what we say, right? 

When we show you the scans, the statistics, the test results, the data for which we base our practice on, you believe us. 

So when we tell you that the coronavirus is really killing young people, why do you argue?

When we tell you that it isn’t just the elderly that are dying from COVID, why don’t you believe us?

When we tell you that just because you are healthy and don’t have an underlying or preexisting condition, doesn’t mean that you will survive the coronavirus, why do you tell me that this is all a hoax?

When we tell you that we have actually seen with our own two eyes how devastating this disease is, why do you tell me the media is making it all up?

When we tell you we have seen how this disease can destroy a perfectly healthy person, how can you tell us you know better because you don’t know anyone who has had it?

When I tell you that I’ve had to face time my deceased patient’s dead body to their loved ones so they can say goodbye, why do you tell me that it really isn’t that deadly? 

When you tell me this will all end after the election, does that mean I won’t get any more COVID admissions to the ICU in December?

The God’s honest truth is, nobody knows. If we, the actual healthcare providers who are really working with COVID patients, are being real with you, this is a guessing game. 

The symptoms, the treatments, the timeline, we do not know what the hell we were hit with, when it will end, or what the right way is. If we don’t know, how do you?

Do masks work to prevent the spread? We think it is worth trying but it is too new for us to say for sure. 

Should you stay home and avoid large crowds? It would reduce your risk of contracting the disease but it is too new to us to say for sure.

Does plaquenil work to treat COVID-19? We think there are better options but we aren’t sure what the best treatment is yet. It’s too new to say for sure.

If I’m young and healthy am I going to die from it? Young and healthy people have died from it but most get through okay. It is still too new to us to say for sure. 

Can I spread it if I don’t have symptoms? Data suggests that you can spread it while asymptomatic but it is still so new to us to say for sure. 

If we don’t have all of the answers, how do you?

Here is what we really do know:

It is too new for us to say anything for certain.

It is real. It is here. 

Yes, even in Iowa.

It isn’t made up. 

It is terrible. 

It is worth wearing a mask because it probably helps limit the spread.

It is worth staying home for because it probably decreases the risk of contracting COVID.

If you don’t get COVID then you don’t spread COVID. 

We believe this to be true with the same conviction that we believe weight loss and exercise lowers blood pressure, the same way we believe you need regular cancer screenings like mammograms and colonoscopies, and the same way we believe you need to finish ALL of your antibiotics even if you are feeling better. 

With that, I’ll close with this:

Trust us like you trust us when we are saving your child. 

Trust us like you trust us when we tell you to take your antibiotics. 

Trust us like you trust us when we tell you you’re cancer free. 

Trust us like you trust your life with us every other day of the year. 

Trust us when we tell you that the coronavirus is real. 

Trust us like we are the #1 most trustworthy profession for the 17th year in a row.

Sincerely, An ICU nurse who actually takes care of COVID patients

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