Carver was normal.
Carver hit every milestone early.
At 10 months we rotated through “bye bye” “so big” “blow kisses” “where’s your hair” “what’s a dinosaur say” and every other pet trick there was in rapid sequence.
Carver started walking on the day he turned 11 months.
Carver knew every farm animal sound, he was by all means “smart” and “above average.”
I was annoyed having to sit through and drag my wild boy to every well child check. What is the point of these things anyway? These questions are so dumb. Who’s kid can’t do these things?
Of course every kid his age could say “mama” and “dada” and “uh-oh” – Carver has been doing that for months.
Of course he can walk along furniture, he’s been walking for MONTHS.
Of course he knows all of his farm animals and what sounds they make!
Of course he can help get himself dressed and bang two toys together!
I’d always leave those appointments wondering what the point of all those questions are.
It wasn’t until I had my second son, Gannon, who had more “no’s” than “yes’s”
Can he walk? No
Can he name one object? No.
Does he have 3 words? No.
Can he identify “mom” or “dad”? No.
Does he know any animal sounds? No.
Does he help himself get dressed? No.
I recall thinking, “Who’s kid can’t do these things?”
My kid. My kid can’t do those things.
It isn’t until your child isn’t reaching those milestones that those questions become very important.
I was naive. It’s a life lesson I wish I didn’t have to learn the hard way.
Instead of leaving the doctor’s office proud and confident I leave feeling defeated and like someone knocked the wind out of me.
Why? What is wrong with my Gannon? What more can we do? Where can we go?
How much is “wait and see” and how much is “take action now.”
They say “the earlier you catch it, the better the outcome” and then say “our soonest available appointment is in 6 months.” Which is it?
Where’s the line of “pushing too hard” and “not pushing hard enough?”
All the late night online searches, all of the rabbit holes I’ve dove down, the scheduling and rescheduling of appointments, the second opinions, the specialists, referrals, none of that has lead to a diagnosis.
So, my fellow moms, if you’re annoyed with all the silly questions at those never ending well child checks, if you don’t have concerns, if you’re hitting every mile stone, be grateful.
Answer YES with confidence to every silly question because some of us can’t.